WOW! You just got asked to be a maid of honor, how exciting! BUT what now!? Keep reading to find out how to be an awesome and helpful maid of honor!
What to Expect
You can do as much as you want to do when it comes to planning! It is up to you and your bride totally! Each bride will have a different plan for what they want you to do and help with, so just go with the flow and help her with her endless to do lists!
• First thing I wanted to do was to start a group message with the bridal party so that you can share ideas, dates, times and important information! This was so helpful because I was able to answer questions that the bridal party might have, it took some stress off the bride and helped her feel less hands off with the plans.
• The next thing that I did was start going to appointments with the bride! Going to these appointments was fun and so helpful, I was able to be an extra set of eyes and ears for the bride and was able to give my opinion when it was asked! I tried to be hands off in these appointments due to it simply just not being my wedding! If asked, I chimed in!
• Help with the to do lists! They have so many and it is so hard to keep track of what you have done or what you need to do - so help keep track of those. Every day for the last week leading up to the wedding I would ask what we needed to do that day and what she needed help with! This was so helpful to the bride and it was nice to have someone to tag along with when running errands all day!
• Be ready to rock your reception speech! I was so nervous for this and did not even write mine until the day of the wedding - I work better under pressure! It was so fun to talk about the bride and the groom and them together! I think it was best to talk from the heart, be ready to cry if you are an emotional person - because even though I said I was not going to cry I did!
What to Plan
• The next step was to start planning - first is the engagement party The engagement party was so much fun, and is something that allows the bride and groom to be celebrate! Make sure to send invites out beforehand and invite the whole bridal party, friend and family of both the bride and groom! The grooms family took over this task, since I was out of town during this party, but I was still included in the messages and decisions, so it was fun to see it all come together in the end!
• Next is the bridal shower if you are choosing to throw one personally or are helping someone! The bridal shower can be thrown by numerous people, so you can either throw one yourself or you can team up with someone else who is throwing one to help out! The grooms family wanted to throw one, so I teamed up with them to help throw it! We were able to do a lot of planning and it came together so beautifully! I think the hardest part of this was to have numerous peoples ideas come together as one, but it came together in the end. I would suggest getting together over a lunch and planning it all out! When we were trying to do it over text, it got so complicated, but coming together in person really really helped! I would also suggest setting up the party the night before if possible, we held the party at my house so that was something that could be done! It helped SO MUCH! We just had to put the finishing touches on the day of and it saved so much time and stress.
• The next event that I planned was the most fun... the bachelorette party! This was so much fun and was something that I was able to plan with the help of the bride! We went to Nashville, I have a blog post all on this trip - you can find that here. This was so easy to plan, we first picked a location and then had to find dates that worked for everyone - that would have to be the hardest due to trying to accommodate everyones schedule, which is when I learned that you really cannot please everyone! We had to go with the date that worked for the most people, which sucks, but has to be done after talking about dates for weeks! The only other thing we planned for this trip was the hotel and the transportation, everything else we did was planned every day when we woke up - which I think is the best way to do it because you never know what is going to come up during the day! It was fun to decorate the room and to just have fun before the wedding!
• Something else that the bride and groom wanted to do was have a fun weekend right before the wedding for the whole bridal party to get together and celebrate! So friday night before the wedding we all went out and hung out as a group! It was a great way to relieve stress and cut loose before the big day! It helped us all calm down and take a quick break from the final touches of the wedding!
• Another duty that I was able to do is help plan the night before the wedding! We had a sleepover at my house, since it was close to the venue! We were able to wake up together and have mimosas, which helped relive stress and allowed us to help and support the bride from the start of the day! We got our hair done at my house and then did makeup at the venue! It worked out great for us and allowed for us to ensure that we had everything we needed before heading up to the venue.
Tips & Tricks
• Keep the bride calm! Things come up unexpectedly no matter how much you plan, so make sure you can be flexible and do what the bride asks of you!
• Make sure the bridal party knows what is going on! The day is so hectic so make sure you know where you need to be when you need to be there and then make sure everyone else knows too!
• Make sure the bride has everything she needs before she walks down the isle! Check the night before, check the day of and check right before she walks down the isle! This was one mistake we made, we left her earrings at my house - but we were flexible and now she had something borrowed!
• Be helpful! I made sure to be by the bride almost the whole night so that she had someone to ask questions to, to cry with and to have fun with! It is such an emotional day, so make sure you are prepared to go the extra mile to make sure things run smooth!
• Make everyday of the planning process fun! It is so stressful, so help the bride make everything fun - including the tasks that are not as fun!
• Fluff the dress! Something so simple, but something that you will forget to do in the moment! During the ceremony and before, help the bride with her dress, make sure it is fluffed and laid perfectly for pictures!
XOXO,
Shelby Marie
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